My friend didn't adopt! Dear Labby's advice

Dear Labby,

I strongly believe that buying pets from a breeder is wrong. Especially when there are so many shelter dogs who get overlooked--and desperately need a home. Recently, an acquaintance bought a Yorkie from a breeder in the next state over. She is having a "puppy shower" and I don't want to attend. I'd like to be honest about why, but a mutual friend thinks I should just say I have other plans. What do you think?

Signed:

Joyless about Unpedigreed Dogs Getting Ignored Everywhere

Well, J.U.D.G.I.E, here's what etiquette says: If you are not comfortable attending, just tell your acquaintance you can't make it and leave it at that. But let me guess, that doesn't quite feel like enough, right?

It's likely that being honest could cause a rift in your relationship, so you need to ask yourself if it's worth it. Instead, and at the risk of sounding like Mr. Caldwell (my high school guidance counselor), could you use this opportunity to educate your peers?

Perhaps when the time comes for the new mom to open shower gifts, you could explain why you chose to make a donation to your local animal shelter instead of bringing a monogrammed doggie sweater or emerald-encrusted leash to the party. Maybe mention you know about a great little Chihuahua from the Humane Society who is looking for a home.

One extra note of advice: If you do end up attending, it might be a good idea to put some thought into your remarks before you make them. Many of us (Dear Labby included) have to work on our holier-than-thou attitude when it comes to animal issues. We'll reach more people if we swap accusatory, judgmental digs for facts delivered with a level-headed indoor voice.

Vegetarian starter-kit, anyone?

Got a petiquette question for Dear Labby? Email dearlabby@dogtime.com

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	It really bothers me the stigma that is attached to buying rather than adopting. I originally wanted to adopt a shelter dog, but got turned down because I didn't have a fenced yard, live in an apartment and work 12 hour shifts. After being rejected several times, I bought a dog. I am a responsible, loving pet owner, with a happy, healthy, well-adjusted dog. And that is all thanks to a breeder. Stop being so narrow-minded and judgemental, please. over 1 year ago by Anonymous
	Buying pets from a breeder is not really WRONG, however rescuing a pet from an animal shelter isn't either. I belive that one may choose to either rescue, or get a dog or other animal from a breeder. almost 2 years ago by Anonymous
	I have had five dogs: all adopted. I think it is unfair to characterize ALL breeders as puppy mills. Clearly generalization is the domain of the uneducated. That is key. Education. Regardless of if you are getting a rescue or a pure bred. Will an unknown heritage rescue be good with your kids? Or will a dog of known temperament be better? Those are your choices and people shouldn't be berated for making them. If you adopt a dog because you feel sorry for it...bad idea. If you buy one because 'I have always wanted one' and don't find out about it...bad idea. Adopt or buy because you have done your homework. I am getting a new dog in a few years. A Spanish Mastiff. He will come from Czechoslovakia, from a breeder who is well known and only has a few litters a year. I have researched this breed for a couple years and I currently own a rescued one. Dogs will always need homes and people shouldn't feel guilty because of their choices. People who are guilted into adopting are not going to make very good owners. People who buy because it was the thing to do won't make very good owners. Do your homework! almost 2 years ago by Anonymous
	Having been a vet tech for years, I feel I can comment on this. I think people have to understand the difference between puppy mills (which are horrific!) and a small family breeder. I am just as passionate as you are about puppy mills, I absolutely DETEST animal abuse in any form!! But I have also taken care of puppies and parents of small family breeders, who are completely responsible pet owners. They devote their lives to the breed of their choice. I think it is unfair to include them in the whole "puppy mill" controversy. I'm 56, have always had pets, and all of my animals have always been rescues. However, I just bought my first pup from a small breeder. I've wanted a Bernese Mtn. Dog for probably twenty years and when I found a gal here in town, I jumped at the chance. And what is more I am going to breed her in two years time. I still have two rescued cats and a rescued dog in my family and they are treasured pets to me. So is this feisty bundle of joy I have now. almost 2 years ago by Anonymous

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